Do You Recognize A Pattern Of Comfortable, But Unhelpful, Interactions In Your Relationship?
Do you and your partner feel stuck in the same old discussions? Have they become so familiar that it’s almost second nature to routinely move on from conflict without resolving it? Perhaps you’re not discussing conflict at all. Relationships can feel hopeless when continuous points of disagreement and misunderstanding aren’t dealt with in healthy, mutually beneficial ways. Couples develop coping mechanisms for conflict, stress, and fear that sweep problems under the rug after recognizing them, or ignore them entirely. These are ways couples address difficulties for short-term relief, but they aren’t solutions.
Couples will disagree, and this is natural. Regardless of the topic of conflict, though—money, sex, children—a negative pattern of interaction stifles real communication. It can be frustrating when a partner seems emotionally distant during discussions, are withdrawn, or ignore conflict. If discussions seem to lead to habitually nodding or superficial agreement without fundamental change occurring, you may feel stuck, overwhelmed, or afraid of inadequacies. People seek couples therapy when they fear they are constantly failing the ones they love, or are unable to make them happy. They want to address how they feel ignored, or sense a lack of commitment and concern.
We Learn How To Interact
Coping mechanisms are natural behaviors, but some of us develop ones that just work okay, or that don’t work at all. These behaviors become dysfunctional in relationships when they lead to disconnection. As a couple, you’re in the most important relationship of your life. You can develop ways of communicating that break the cycle of “comfortable” interaction that works for the moment, but fails to resolve conflict.
Through couples therapy, you can change your behavior. You learn to relate to one another in healthy, productive ways that honor both parties. You learn to see and to be seen. You learn to hear and to be heard. Most importantly, you learn to understand and to be understood by one another.
Couples Therapy With Christine Sprague Can Help
Christine Sprague is trained in Emotionally Focused Therapy, and has successfully performed couples counseling since 2006. Her approach focuses on the patterns and cycles couples find themselves in, and allows couples to discover where they begin and why. She facilitates discussion about the reactions these cycles perpetuate, and uses the information so couples can prevent them.
Christine Sprague’s approach to therapy is framed so it validates the issue couples struggle with, while avoiding personal blame or casting judgment. By focusing on your dynamic, you recognize and learn patterned behavior in order to change it.
But You Still May Have Questions Or Concerns…
We’re afraid we can’t afford couples therapy.
On the one hand, couples therapy is an investment in your relationship’s future. Couples don’t receive any formal, how-to training in relationships, and our primary relationship is the one most important to us. It impacts our day-to-day comfort and happiness tremendously. When you address unhappiness in your relationship, everything in both of your lives becomes much, much easier. In this way, your money is very well invested.
On the other hand, couples therapy is far cheaper than divorce. Regardless of the outcome, therapy is never money wasted because you learn skills that make you a better partner. Couples therapy allows you to learn about yourself, about others, and about how you interact.
My partner is unwilling to come to couples therapy, or thinks it’s unnecessary.
It is not uncommon for one partner to fear blame, judgment, or condemnation. However, this form of therapy is focused on overcoming the patterns the couple engages in, including patterns of blame and reactivity. By uncovering the root causes of conflict, you can discover a place of mutual support and emotional security.
Christine Sprague’s approach is partnership focused. It is never not focused on finding out who’s at greater fault.
Call To Action
Contact Christine Sprague for a free, in-person consultation. As a couple, join her to discuss the circumstances of your relationship. Together you can make certain her communication style suits your needs. If not, she will help you find the appropriate support.
You can schedule via email through this website, or feel free to call (303) 815- 0553.